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Lessons Learned from Motherhood

“Mother is the name for God on the lips and hearts of all children.” William Makepeace Thackeray I have been a parent for just over 5 and half years now. I am not an expert, I don’t hold the magic key and sometimes I still wish they came with a user’s manual. I see expectant new mothers showered with advice and shake my head in mirth. I was twenty five when I got pregnant. I wasn’t as prepared as some, but we all do what we have to. I have made a lot of mistakes and learned a lot. I thought it would be fun to share what I learned. Advice. It sounds all fine and dandy, but not everyone knows what they are talking about. No two babies or mommies are a like. Similar, yes, but not the same. I have found that with motherhood comes the desire to be the authority and give unsolicited advice. It seems that as soon as someone becomes a parent, the sensor comes off. Everyone wants to believe that what they did was the best for their child, so by getting you to believe their beliefs, someho...
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I Believe...

I Believe... That just because two people argue, It doesn't mean they don't love each other. And just because they don't argue, It doesn't mean they do love each other. I Believe... That we don't have to change friends if We understand that friends change. I Believe.... That no matter how good a friend is, They're going to hurt you every once in a while And you must forgive them for that. I Believe... That true friendship continues to grow, Even over the longest distance. Same goes for true love. I Believe... That you can do something in an instant That will give you heartache for life. I Believe.... That if I work on it, I can become the person I want to be. I Believe... That you should leave loved ones with Loving words. It may be the last time you see them. I Believe.... That you can keep going long after you think you can't. I Believe.... That we are responsible for what We do, no matter how we feel. I Believe... ...
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Cupcakes on the Brain

I have been dying to make cupcakes. I keep thinking about it. I make lists and search recipes at least once a day. I keep finding new ideas. However, I am on a diet and can’t touch starch (flour) for another few weeks. But I can’t wait to bake! Here are the ideas for the cupcakes that I want to make. The first one is a fresh peach cupcake with brown sugar icing. Sounds divine, doesn’t it? Plus with all of the plump, juicy fresh peaches roaming the streets this time of year, you just must take advantage of that flavor. I found some really good recipes for this on-line. Next is a cream cheese cupcake with red velvet icing. I have never had this type before. Normally the cupcake is red velvet and the icing is cream cheese. However, my new friend has promised me his family recipe for this icing, so I just need to figure out the cupcake part. Lastly, I want to make an orange marmalade ricotta cupcake. Oh, it is like having a summer party in your mouth. The cake is thicker and moister than...
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New Chapter

Life is always changing ebbing and flowing going one direction and coming back full circle again. Never exactly in the same spot as before, but always seeming familiar. My life has changed a lot in the last few months. I met a man, when I least expected it. It turned out wonderful. My idea of a life experiment opened me up to see and meet someone I wouldn’t have normally. With this shinning gift, I am also becoming more aware of deeper things about myself, both positive and negative that I didn’t know before. I pushed myself further out of my comfort zone than before, and surprisingly enough, I wasn’t scared. I have more faith in myself, my life and my ability to heal than ever before. With his strong heart he demanded and encouraged me to match his speed and depth of love and it is truly been eye opening. He will forever be a part of my heart. Having a strong hand told hold in life has brought me back to some things I really love. I have discovered more about my back bone than I e...
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Same Old Disease, New Cure

I was doing a bit of research the other day on statistics and just happened to come across an interesting article on the web. One of the interesting points that it covered was equating being single with having a disease. At first I though it was absurd, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized that I think this way. I feel that my single status is something I need to fix, something that I need to cure. Having realized this, I stopped for a second. Was my being single something that I really needed to cure? This brought about a whole slew of thoughts and realizations going back to my childhood. I have thought that being alone, or being a half of something wasn’t enough. In fact I have thought this way for so long, that I couldn’t picture my life without having someone there. I depended so much on this idea that it never occurred to me that I wouldn’t find someone, that I would have to live this life all on my own. So, if my being single is something to be cured, is being...
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Fine

How are you doing? I am fine. Well, what does fine mean? Recently I have had an unexpected turn of my life. Normally, I do fine in the personal department, and just hold my own professionally. I handle the balls in my life with general ease and manage everything. These past few months have shown a real turn in events. As I work harder professionally to get ahead, I find myself having to sacrifice personally. This makes me uncomfortable. My work life is great, but my personal life is bowing in the mist of it. I respect and understand that life is made up of many parts. We cannot focus solely on one part and come out satisfied with our lives. I have almost always put family before work, until now. I feel that weight of my decisions on me, and I am not sure that the choice I made is the right one. As a single woman with a child, I have to work harder to give us everything we need and deserve. I beat the odds and got my daughter into a fantastic private school. I know this is what sh...
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"I hate to break it to you babe But I'm not drowning There's no one here to save Who cares if you disagree You are not me Who made you king of anything So you dare tell me who to be Who died and made you king of anything" - King of Anything Lyrics Late one night I was sitting up with my friend and in the giddiness of night signed me up for an on-line dating service. I spent 15 minutes trying to think of the right tag line. I don't think this world is for me. I took my profile off the next day, mainly due to embarrassment. It was hard to admit that I needed to explore on-line dating to find a date. As I was talking this over with my friends and family, my brother remarked that you needed to be able to just put yourself out here and not care what anyone else thought of you. Two years ago this would have been a completely foreign concept. Now, this is something that I work on everyday. Am I completely comfortable with who I am? Isn't that the first ...
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Soundtrack of My Life

I have long since forgotten when music became an essential part of me. It reaches down and touches my soul (or me for that matter). When I am driving and the windows are down and the music is as loud as my speakers will permit, I feel the fingers of love, heartbreak, passion or rock creep down and move something in me. As I think about it, I was raised on rock and roll, country and classical music. My appreciation has grown over the years to include jazz, metal, emo and just about every other form of music. What determines whether I like the music is not so much what genre that song falls into, as much as whether it gets through my outer skin, sinking into the cracks of my armor and permeating my soul. I believe that the music I listen to is the soundtrack of my life. The mood I am often leads me to turn up a particular song, or skip another. At one point I thought I was uncomfortable with silence, but I found I was just more comfortable with music. Music to me is a modern form of ...
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So Long Past. Hello Present, Did You Bring Future with You?

Every time I miss a particular person I reread our last words to each other and I remember the pain. I remember it was like a part of me fell away. Pain can be a good reminder. Pain can also be good inspiration to live the life we have and enjoy the good things. How come the happier I am the guiltier I feel? Why do I need to find a way to sabotage every relationship without giving it a chance? Is this relationship good for me? Yes, beyond a doubt, this relationship is a very good thing for me. Is it scary and do I want to run a way? No. Yes. No. Gosh, it is, but the best part of it is that I am not letting that dark side of me win. I can’t do this alone, but this time I don’t have to. I am going to inch by inch start to shed the walls I have built. Nothing I can say or do can change what happened before. But something can be said for the future. And for the first time in a really long time, I can see a future I am not afraid of.
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To Ask or Not to Ask, Is That Really the Question?

To Ask or Not to Ask, Is That Really the Question? The news of what Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer did with Support Our Law Enforcement and Safe Neighborhoods Act (SB1070) has slowly trickled into my life. I don’t ever watch the news, so hearing about this from the grapevine has been my only source of information. Until recently. A few months ago I found out it was unlawful for a police officer to ask an immigrant’s legal status in the state of California. My native Mexican friend was explaining how police officers have harassed him and a friend of his. I know that this particular police force has been known for being vicious. I have experienced being cited by them, and let’s just say it was the first time I felt afraid in this particular city. Any how, back to the point. He told me they asked a friend his status and was trying to tell me how this was a basic violation of his rights. I try to be a very understanding person, but I didn’t get how asking someone if they are breaking the law,...
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